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are the northern lights always drunk?

i think this one is totally wasted.

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(Source: ohwhattodotodietoday)

oh fuck, it is?

(Source: trollingchannel, via seaspraypony)

Groves: It hurts!

Dentist: Oh, don’t be a baby.

Groves: Who are you calling a baby?

Dentist: Nobody. Forget it, forget I said anything. Uh huh, there is a tooth that’s rotted out. So, we’re going to have to pull it. That means I have to take a needle and inject some Novocaine in your mouth.

Groves: I hate needles.

Dentist: Everybody does. And I have to drill.

Groves: I hate drills…

Dentist: Right now so do I. Right now I wish there were holistic dentistry.

Groves: I’m in pain…

Dentist: Well you’re going to be in a lot more before we’re finished. But after that you won’t have any pain. See? If I cause you pain it’s not my fault, so don’t bite my head off! I mean, uh…

Groves: I know what you mean.

(Source: world-forgot)

D’Angelo: He ate his mother.

Schibetta: Get out of here.

D’Angelo: So I heard. He killed her, then he blew off her head, smothered it in onions.

Ortolani: What, no garlic?

D’Angelo: He had his father in the freezer.

Schibetta: Sick fuck. What the fuck’s wrong with this country? In the old days, murder was murder. You killed someone, it was business. You sure as Christ didn’t eat them.

Ortolani: Times have changed, Nino.

Schibetta: Fuck that. Times changed. Nothing changes. Nothing ever changes.

(via xxoreilyxx-deactivated20120320)

Groves: This is my tooth. It was in my head. This tooth and I have been together since we were kids. This tooth chewed on my mom.
Ross: You should sell it.
Groves: Sell it?
Ross: Sell it. The tooth from the mouth of Donald Groves? Do you know how much that’s worth on the open market?
Groves: How much?
Ross: Plenty.
Groves: Who’d wanna buy my tooth?
Ross: Collectors.
Groves: Collectors?
Ross: Collectors. People collect everything, stamps, salt and pepper shakers, World’s Fair tchochkes. Some people collect crime stuff. Lindbergh’s ladder, Ted Bundy’s toenail clippings, and this.
Groves: We’d have to get a fence, right?
Ross: We’re in prison. How hard’s that gonna be?
Groves: Ross, if we get a good price, I still got 30 more.

(Source: xxoreillyxx, via xxoreilyxx-deactivated20120320)

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punkrockmomjeans:

I’m just really impressed that Barbara Billingsley knows so much about murder.

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